Wednesday, January 9, 2008

scarier than dating

OK, this might sound weird, but do any of you have a hard time making new friends? I mean, am I the only one who feels awkward and nervous, and frankly, scared to death to pick up the phone and ask some cool woman to go out for lunch? I have been thinking about this a lot lately, because I have realized that I am partly to blame for my lack of great friends here in Effingham. I have been too scared to reach out to new people, so have stuck with some already established friendships, some of which are really kind of toxic.

I know there are only like 2 people who even read this blog and I have discussed this issue with you guys before, but I am here to say that one of my goals this year is to get out of my comfort zone and make some new friends. Wish me luck!

3 comments:

Amy Jane said...

Patty,

I think that making more friends is a wonderful goal for the year. And I know that if you just reach out, you can do it! What makes me sad is that if you're so scared to just call someone and try to plan a lunch or something, it must be because you're so insecure that you don't think you have enough to offer that person. Patty, you have so much to offer that it's not even funny! You're a wonderful, amazing, smart, warm, supportive, funny, genuine woman, and any woman in Effingham would be lucky to call you her friend. You have to believe in yourself and believe that you are of value to others, because you most certainly are! I, for one, don't know what I'd do without you in my life. You're my rock, and that's even from 3.5 hours away. So, imagine what you could do for someone who actually lives there! :) You have GOT to stop selling yourself short and realize that you're awesome. I wish you much courage as you try to establish contact with new people and make new friends. And I'm always here to listen. Just remember that you really don't have anything to lose. If someone isn't interested, then so what? They probably just don't have the time or inclination for a new friend, and it has absolutely nothing to do with you. If they are interested, then you're good to go. You'll never know unless you try. Get out there!...

beckbot said...

Patty,
Amy's completely right. I meet/have met people largely through awkward invitations to my house or a playgroup or something. I have had a few equally awkward moments where it became clear that we didn't really "click," and then I feel like a loser for a week and then, oblivious to my loser status, I try again. As with anything difficult, pray about it and look for the Lord's guidance.

JMS said...

Hey! I'm the same way. But I know that sometimes you have to just swallow the nerves (and hope they don't come back up again!) and make that connection. It's worth the effort I find. And some of us are destined I think to have a few really good friends. That's okay. And if Amy likes you, you must be great! Personally, from what I read on your blog and in your comments to her, I wish I lived in Effingham so I could be your friend. Or maybe we could both live somewhere better. :-)